Telepathic Secretary
If one isn't already in the works, let's invent the Telepathic Secretary.
Whoever has the means to invent it is welcome to the patent, if you can promise me a lifetime supply of Telepathic Secretaries and eternal health coverage.
I understand the creation of the Telepathic Secretary could be dangerous, but it's a chance I'm willing to take.
Here's how you make it:
1. Record which parts of your brain are stimulated when you think of certain sounds: ie, "When I think of the sound 'the,' I am stimulated in sector 847.23.XX.11107.B of my brain." Record results for as many sounds as you can think of. If you're stuck for ideas, consult Dr. Seuss' "On Beyond Zebra."
2. The Telepathic Secretary transcribes Phonetic Brain Stimulations into an iPod-sized Word Processing computer, creating an instantaneous mental diary.
Whoever has the means to invent it is welcome to the patent, if you can promise me a lifetime supply of Telepathic Secretaries and eternal health coverage.
I understand the creation of the Telepathic Secretary could be dangerous, but it's a chance I'm willing to take.
Here's how you make it:
1. Record which parts of your brain are stimulated when you think of certain sounds: ie, "When I think of the sound 'the,' I am stimulated in sector 847.23.XX.11107.B of my brain." Record results for as many sounds as you can think of. If you're stuck for ideas, consult Dr. Seuss' "On Beyond Zebra."
2. The Telepathic Secretary transcribes Phonetic Brain Stimulations into an iPod-sized Word Processing computer, creating an instantaneous mental diary.
posted by JO'B at 20:09
2 Comments:
And be faced with the sickening realization that half my thoughts are in fact lesbian fantasies involving a female me and.....a female me....
Sorry to put you out, but no sir.
In some ways, Anonymous, you and I are very different people.
For instance, half of my thoughts are fantasies involving a female me and a shemale me. And that is my primary motivation for inventing the Tele-tary.
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